Ever since I can remember society has implemented a sub-conscious thought as to who I am supposed to be or what I am supposed to look like. Commercials, movies, models, pictures of people on vacations, money, or something as simple as the colors blue and pink. Children are engrained at a very young age that boys like blue and girls like pink. These types of ideas often times form people into an in-authentic version of themself because they feel as if they need to live up to a certain standard that society has created. Men aren't supposed to cry or show emotions because this idea is only "socially acceptable" for woman. How many times have you heard the phrase "men don't cry" or "stop being so sensitive". This has been passed down for generations and has ultimately led to people suppressing their emotions and feelings, causing extreme emotional immaturity in people that leads to many dysfunctional behaviors to compensate for their basic lack of understanding of feelings.
Theodore Roosevelt said "Comparison is the thief of joy." This quote could not be more accurate. If you were the only person to ever exist in this world with no one before you or after you, there would be no such thing as self-defeating beliefs. We were not born with these beliefs they are instead learned ways of thinking that we have inherited over the years of our lives based off comparisons of others and society standards. Every time you scroll through facebook, instagram, or other social media outlets there is a good chance at some point you will compare yourself to someone else or their lifestyle without even knowing you are doing it. Christmas time rolls around and you are looking at pictures of your friends who are gifting their children new iPads and other expensive luxuries and you immediately feel inadequate or inferior as a mother or father because that just isn't in your budget. Understand that the internal qualities someone carries or the morals you teach your children are far more valuable than any external thing they may possess.
We are all our own fingerprint. We all have infinite value, there will never be another you and there has never been one in the past. Accept that and start to love and appreciate the only vehicle in this life you were given, which is yourself. Understand that you don't ever have to be a super model to be beautiful, and your ability to be a mother or father is not determined by the external luxuries you give them. If you are a boy and like the color pink, then love that part of yourself. If you are a man and want to cry, then cry away. Fall in love with your idiosyncrasy's and never try to change them to conform to what other people think you should be. Be yourself, love yourself, and you will finally be able to love others in the same manner.